The Games of Gods
by Master of The Blood Wolves
Summary: Gods get bored sometimes. They're also vengeful and have a nasty sense of humour. For the mortals who're unwitting pawns in these games, anything can and probably will happen, often with hilarious results and massive costs in property damage.
1. Chapter 1

The Games of Gods

Chapter I

Prologue: Setting the Board

**Disclaimer: The Inheritance Cycle and Discworld are the IPs of their respective authors and the co-authors of this story have no claim to either.**

**Furthermore, any reference to any other established IP follows as above.**

**This story is a fanwork and not written with the aim of monetary profit.**

**All IPs are used in accordance with Fair Use.**

**AN(s):**

**Master of the Blood Wolves****: I'm doing something a little different this time.**

**I'm not the only author on this one. Instead I'm writing this alongside some friends of mine from a forum we all hang around. **

**So, over to them for a few words:**

**LoverofGames****: Well hello everyone. To any of you that have read my other works, sorry for the constant delay's as I've been sidetracked by, by this point, two collaborative writing projects plus my senior year. I hope that my work here, where it crops up, will satisfy you regardless of whether or not you are waiting on my other works.**

**Rustic94:** **Greetings everyone. Sorry to those who've read my first attempt at fanfic but I'm currently trying to figure out how to continue with all the work load. If ye've question on the characters or some of their backgrounds just PM for a forum and I'll put up on on my page for discussing the characters, themes or story elements.**

**ArtArk:** **Don't mind me I am just here for the insanity to settle in.**

Some Creators have more imagination than mechanical aptitude.

Other Creators have more mechanical aptitude than imagination.

And then there are a rare handful who've got a lot of both. Unfortunately, that handful know it and are generally despised by the former two types of Creator for being insufferably smug and condescending.

The same can be said for the Gods these Creators leave to watch over their Creations.

Only, being Gods and being a bit more impulsive and full of ego than Creators because of it, they're not above playing interdimensional practical jokes.

This usually amounts to orchestrating a chain of events that leads to one or another of a rival pantheon being knocked off by a hero, who more often than not is hacked off over something or other that was pinned on their victim by the practical joker.

On one memorable occasion, a God from some backwater dimension,-in a moment of true inspiration,-framed the notorious trickster God, Loki, for the murder of Baldor, Odin's favourite son and made certain he stayed dead.

This incident lead to that particular dimension experiencing it's apocalypse a few thousand years earlier than it should have and the survivors,-after they migrated to a new dimension and sidled into the ranks of a new pantheon,-sued the offending pantheon for damages. Litigation is still ongoing and wars have been fought between the pantheons on the matter.

Some pantheons however, such as the Gods of Dunmanifestin, prefer subtler means of extracting entertainment from their too-smug-by-half peers in mechanically-sound and creatively wondrous dimensions.

On this particular day Fate had just gotten through visiting an old acquaintance of his, Angvard the God of Death and the Underworld, in one such dimension created by a Creator with both a great deal of imagination and mechanical aptitude.

He was not in a very good mood however.

During his visit, Ra'zac the God of said species of eldritch horrors and self-mutilation, had passed some rather unflattering remarks about the Discworld and decided to boast about his little corner of the dimension which his patron species were worshipped in.

The fact that Dras Leona made Ankh-Morpork look positively safe and sanitary did little to impress the insectoid Ra'zac. This had attracted the other local Gods and soon what had been a civil reunion between old friends had turned into a Roast of the Discworld.

Now, Fate was incensed.

It was plain bad manners to insult another God's dimension of residence and the fact that the Discworld was widely held to exist only because every probability curve needed it's far end was a sore point for the Gods of Dunmanifestin.

It was also a bad idea to mention it.

'He went _there_?' Asked Blind Io, incredulously.

'Yes. He did.' Fate groused as he forced a truly cruel and unusual fate on a hapless thief who'd just retrieved a treasure of incalculable value.

'Well I never...' Several of Blind Io's eyes that were in attendance had narrowed and if they had've occupied the blank expanse of skin covered in cloth where they would've resided in any other being, they'd have formed a formidable scowl.

'We can't just let that lie.' Observed Seven-Handed Sek, the Discworld's self-proclaimed God of vengeance. 'If we do, we'll be the laughing stuff.'

'That goes without saying.' Blind Io agreed. 'But how to punish them...'

'Ask old Melkor for a loan of that big dragon of his? Anchovious, or whatever his name was?' Suggested Offler, making a heroic effort not to lisp through his crocodile snout-mouth.

'How about we open a portal or two to the Dungeon Dimensions on them?' Suggested Seven-Handed Sek. 'That never fails, that one.'

'What's this?'

The congregation of Gods paused as they saw the newcomer:

Errata, Goddess of misunderstandings and generally regarded as a compulsive troublemaker.

'Fate just returned from visiting an old friend of his and one of said friend's fellow Gods instigated a Roast. Of us.' Blind Io explained mordantly.

'And unleashing monsters from other dimensions is all you can come up with to teach them why it's excessively stupid to make fun of other Gods?' Errata asked politely.

'What would you do then, Errata?' Fate asked, a cruel twinkle appearing in his already fathomless, starry eyes.

Errata just smiled wolfishly.

'Why don't we invite them to a Game?' She asked innocently.

The assembled Gods traded looks.

As one God, they all nodded and smiled nastily as they realised what Errata was suggesting.

* * *

><p>'A Game?' Said Guntera, Chief of the Dwarven Gods of Alagaesia, sounding intrigued.<p>

'Yes, a Game.' Repeated Blind Io with a nod. 'That regrettable incident when Fate paid a visit to Angvard not long ago convinced me that we Gods ought to get to know one another better to avoid another Ragnarok Incident.' Blind Io explained reasonably.

The rugged-featured Dwarf God hummed and harred to himself.

'Well, it has been dreadful boring here, ever since those dratted elves came over the sea and stopped fighting with the dragons, we've had to stop playing them. Those bloody Riders always interfered and ruined the fun.' He said. 'Angvard insists that things have changed recently but it hardly seems worth the effort.'

'Oh, where's the harm?' Blind Io asked cajolingly. 'Why, the Lady and Fate agreed that this would be fun for all involved. And those two never agree on anything.'

'Really?' Guntera asked curiously. 'And what did you have in mind for this Game?'

'Oh, the usual. Pick a Champion, throw them through challenges and things and generally muck about and have fun. Drink, place bets on the side...'

Guntera nodded decisively.

'Sounds like a grand time and like I say, it's been a few thousand years since we've been able to do that without mortals interfering and spoiling our fun.' He said.

'Excellent. Do you have any objection if we bring over our own Champions?' Blind Io enquired.

Guntera thought about it for a second, then summoned the other Gods of Alagaesia.

They debated and argued for a while, before they fell silent, an agreement having been reached.

'Why not?' Guntera asked rhetorically. 'Seems like it could be fun, especially if they're different from the usual humourless lot that run around down there.' He added, gesturing to where Alagaesia could be seen in an exquisitely detailed carved map on a table that looked as if it hadn't seen use in years.

'Don't worry about that.' Blind Io assured. Then brightened as he remembered something 'Oh, and Fate said he might be inviting a friend along from somewhere else and that they'd be playing as well.' He said.

'For our first game in years, the more the merrier!' Guntera said, a huge grin on his face while the other Gods fell to discussing who'd make for the best Champions, and congregating over by the table to get reacquainted with the world they'd been ignoring in exasperation for nearly a thousand years.

* * *

><p>"Well, this is boring," The man said to his pet as he sat down on the thick stone walls overlooking the bustling streets of Ankh-Morpork, the scaly weasel like dragon coiled in a ball as its four green slit-pupiled eyes gazed up at its master. The man sighed, his scarred right hand reaching into his baggy trouser pocket and rummaged through it as he stuck his tongue out slight and bit down with a little pressure. "Now, where's that bleedin'...ah ha!"<p>

The man's hand retracted from his breeches pocket, a smoking pipe in his wrinkled right hand. He then put the pipe into his other hand, the leather like glove that he wore made a crinkling sound as he gripped the pipe by the stem as his scarred right hand stuffed some brown, crinkled leaves into the chamber. The man reached up with his scarred hand and rubbed his chin; the dark blond little hairs creating a scratching noise as his finger nails rubbed against them.

He held the pipe out as he put his left arm around the coiled up reptile's neck while it rubbed its head against his side and purred loudly. The black draconian creature was the size of his leg.

"May you do honours old Alfie?" He asked his pet. The scaly, angular head left his side and gaze towards the pipe. It opened its mouth, neck and cheeks bulging slightly until it squirted two short jets of liquid. The two jets of liquids ignited as they met each other with a large bang and produced a small stream of fire blasted against the chamber of the pipe.

"Thank you Alfie," The man quipped as brought the lip of the smoking pipe up to his mouth and started to inhale, the brown dried leaves in the chamber burning bright red as he inhaled. His pet companion lay her head down on his lap and purred loudly as he scratched and rubbed the back of her long scaly ears that wigged and waved as he did so. "And it looks like this fire retardant glove did work."

_Must thank my uncle in that wizards academy nearby when I get the chance_. "Huh, must get back to work soon or else ol' Richard here will get a talk down by even oler' Vimes for muckin' about." He said out loud.

Richard reached for his breastplate set next to his other side; he pulled his copper helmet off as he brought the breastplate closer. He carefully slipped the breastplate on, avoiding any chances of disturbing Alfie. He then slipped the rough but well maintained iron breastplate on over his chainmail shirt, adjusting the straps as Alfie rose up and stretched her body as she yawned.

"Well, I guess it is time we got to work." Richard put his helmet on and bit down on the stem of the smoking pipe as he ensured he had all his gear. He then grabbed the corners of his detached larger than usual waterproofed city watch cape in his hands and then pushed himself off the wall, the strong breeze blowing up caught the cape and made it act as a parachute as he floated down slowly to the ground. His tall size hiding his very light frame as he continued to smoke on the way down, his pet companion sliding down the stone wall with her resilient claws.

Richard braced himself for the landing; his legs crouched up as he prepared himself. He grunted as he rolled when he reached the ground, barely avoiding a brush as he stood up in a green piece of land near the street. He pulled the pipe out of mouth and looked into the chamber, all the tobacco leaves gone. He sighed, putting the pipe away into his satchel and then flapped his cape and put it on, tying the two straps together over his neck.

"Better attempt, still wish the tobacco didn't come out of-"He stopped in mid-sentence as he felt a tug on his left breeches leggings. Richard looked down to find Alfie tugging his legging and trying to drag him towards the crowded streets.

"Alright, alright we're goin', we're goin'." Richard said with a smile as he walked next to his scaly dragon like pet, his leather boots clapping against the stone cobbled pavement as he and Alfie moved through the crowd. He boots splashed into a pond, making Richard smirk to himself. "And this is why I choose boots and not sandals."

* * *

><p>"<em>City Watch<em>," The woman who watched Richard walk said to herself, her long, pointed ears only barely visible underneath her even longer, flowing brown hair. She adjusted her oversized scarf as she walked away. "Always taking risks, he's lucky I keep him becoming a splattered stain on the ground by using magic. Seriously, who develops the routine of jumping off three storey walls at nine o'clock in the morning?"

The woman adjusted her red and black pointed hat as she waltzed through the crowd. She put her hands into her large fluffy coat that reached to her ankles. "Heh, imagine that, Miss Alice Rickes, long-eared daughter of Issa Rickes watching over bumbling wizes and death-wish wishing brownjobs… couldn't wish for anything less." She mumbled quietly to herself, a large smile crossing her face as she walked to the docks.

There Alice stopped near the edge of a wooden pier overlooking the river Ankh, she inhaled and then she froze. On the opposite side of the pier were three people bathing in the sunlight, without shirts and in their undergarments. They waved to Alice, their cheerful faces turning to confused and then angry frowns as Alice walked away from the pier, almost running in fact.

"Urgh, nudity... why… just why did they have sunbath near my favourite spot to take in the air and daydream away at." Alice shuddered as she walked away as quickly as she could trying in vain to get rid of the images of the sunbathers' bare skin. "It's already hard enough taking baths with my eyes closed, now I'm stuck with the after images of those people."

Alice stopped near the building that she was staying in while in Ankh-Morpork. The witch walked near the back, and after looking left and right she climbed up the drainage pipe and stood atop the roof, her well toned muscles and frame underneath her clothes worked hard as she climbed and leapt until she was on top of the roof of the four storey inn.

Alice then sat down on the corner of the rooftop, inhaling and exhaling as she took in the sight of Ankh-Morpork. The rising sun reflected its light off the white stone work of some of the buildings while highlighting the dark greys, brown and clay red of the others as people of all sizes, gender, species and profession walked the streets beneath her; they were talking, arguing, kissing, trading or just taking in the morning fresh(1) air as they fulfilled their busy schedules of the day.

"Ankh-Morpork… It may not be the best place in the world but it has marvels and pleasant folk to get past the day." Alice said to herself with a wide grin, taking her hat off which pulled several strands of her brown hair back to fully show her pointed ears. She laid back on the rooftop, one leg across the other as she crossed her hands behind her head and closed her eyes while listening to the music of the street performers below.

* * *

><p>You know there is only so much patience someone can take before they get fed up and just walk away from it all, or just turn around and punch the person next to them in the snout if that is what you would prefer. A dog can abandon it's master if it's abused too much, a city can rebel against its rulers if they are tired of living in a poor excuse of a lifestyle, and the gods could get tired of someone who annoys them and make a pig fall out of the sky and take care of the bugger once and for all.<p>

For Vaughn Moltenslate his patience was running thin right now, it started out as just a mild annoyance in the beginning that he thought he could just ignore but now that two hours had passed by he was now at the point of taking out his frustration on something or someone nearby, and there happened to be unfortunately only one other person there for him to talk to and it so happened to be the source of his very troublesome today.

"You just had to be a pain in the ass towards me today didn't ya, if it was not for you I could be in Ankh-Morpork by now hitting up a tavern and having some nice drinks!" the middle aged Dwarf shouted as he was pacing back and forth on the dirt road kicking some of the stones as he walked past them.

Once the Dwarf had finished walking in a circle letting off some steam a few minutes later he made his way back towards his cart full of goods and collapsed down on to his backside, leaning back and letting out a sigh.

After a few minutes of calming down and catching his breath he turned his attention back to his current problem with a hard glare, and receiving a bored stare from his horse companion.

Vaughn did not know how long he stared hatefully at the brown horse who equalled his with it's own bored stare but the Dwarf did not feel like partaking in a staring contest with the animal, his anger could only fuel him for so long and he had no intention to try and beat the record of how long someone can hold a staring contest with a four legged animal, after all that record currently belonged to one wizard who won a staring contest against a lizard after four straight days until the reptile found better interest in the insect it was going to eat for lunch nearby.

He ran his fingers through his golden brown beard as he turned away from the board horse and pondered on what he should do now that he's ran out of ideas to keep himself busy out here in the middle of nowhere, his pride and anger had only carried him this far and now it seems boredom had finally set in, and one thing Vaughn disliked the most, besides his older brothers, was sitting around in one area and doing nothing at all.

"I should never have bought you from my cousin, you're more hassle than you're worth." The merchant said as he gave one more quick glare towards his horse before leaning back against the wooden frame of his cart and looking up at the sky, wishing or just begging for something to happen to spare him of this tormenting dull nothingness called sitting around and waiting.

* * *

><p>Thumper sighed as he picked up the petrified troll named Granite. The golem had this routine of picking up the preacher, each and every day that he laid flat drunk in front of the bakers' home. The golem carefully scooped up the troll in his arms, ensuring that he didn't break a limb off as he moved to the door of the bakers.<p>

The nine foot golem carefully held Granite in one arm as he used his other hand to gently knock on the door. "Miss Glimma," Thumper said, his voice rumbling and deep, "need some assistance madam."

The door opened to reveal a grey haired woman, her wrinkled face smiling at the golem. "Ah he never learns does he?"

"He does not ma'am, always too drunk to learn to come in before sunlight hours." The golem answered, laughing along with the woman as he carefully tried to step in through the door. The woman moved aside and opened the door to the bakery room.

"At least he was wearing some undergarments this time around." Miss Glimma half joked to the Golem as he carried the troll into the bakery, he grunted as he banged his head off the door frame as he tried to move into the room. He set the perifted troll on a nearby table, the same table they used many times before for such an occasion.

"True, wish he'd stop preaching as it has only embarrassed me and made 'im into a bit of local attraction," Thumper watched Miss Glimma walk over to the baking oven. She slipped a pair of oven gloves on and open the door of the oven, she whistled a slow and cheerful tune as she pulled out the tray of freshly baked cakes. "After all, who wouldn't like a preacher who talks about a god who is more or less about getting drunk and pays for your drink."

Miss Glimma giggled to herself as she walked over to one of the tables to put icing on the cake. Her husband who had a sharply cut greying beard and kind brown eyes walked in through the front door of the bakery, carrying a small sack of flour. He looked at the troll that steared from his sleep.

"A good night I presume?" Mister Glimma asked the troll as he set the sack of flour down on a table opposite of Miss Glimma who was offering Thumper a cake.

"Ah yes, it wa' a ver' good nigh', a fantast' night it was." The troll known as Granite the Ditch Dweller slurred back. Thumper sighed before stuffing the cake into his gaping mouth, using his lips to break down the cake. "Ah no' com' on Thumpa, me spee' when go back to nor-mal in a fews houras. Then I'll preach again and drinkies for everyon'."

"Granite, we're are going down to the sewers to look for stuff as I can't find anyone to hire me and you spent the last of our money on beer," Thumper grabbed a large sack and walked over to Granite, he picked Granite up who struggled uselessly against the golem before being stuffed into the sack. Thumper hefted the sack over his shoulder and walked towards the front door."And the beer wasn't even for yourself."

"Is that really necessary Thumper?" Miss Glimma asked, a frown on her wrinkled face as she looked at the golem who didn't look back as the he opened the front door.

"Not sure, might stop him from going dormant in sunlight but it certainly shuts him up so that he doesn't butcher the art of speech and language anymore." The golem replied as he walked out of the Bakery and into the street.

* * *

><p>There was a general buzz of excitement around the World Table as the players of the Game assembled,-or at least, the current players, it had been agreed that if need be players could drop in or out as needed or as circumstances permitted.<p>

Of Alagaesia's Gods, only Angvard the Death God, Sindri the Earth Goddess and the Fate of Alagaesia,-Grey-Eyed Destiny,- were starting.

This was because Ra'zac's chosen Champions were under magical compulsion that made it near impossible for them to participate and his most devout human follower had long ago hacked his arms and legs off.

Meanwhile, Gunterra was content to sit and watch,-along with the other Alagaesian Gods.

The Discworld's players consisted of Bilious, God of Hangovers, Errata, Goddess of Misunderstandings, The Lady, and the Fate of the Discworld who was currently fetching his mysterious 'guest player'.

'You've made some rather...interesting choices of champions.' Observed Helzvog, the Father of the Dwarves.

'Always makes for an interesting Game.' Explained Blind Io as he looked through his notes. He would be adjudicating and throwing challenges at the Champions if things got too boring.

There was a sudden strangeness around the table, then the Fate of the Discworld was there along with a violently hot-pink ten-limbed creature which was being orbited by mystic and occult symbols.

'Sorry we're late.' Fate said pleasantly. 'This is Arcanist.' He said, motioning to his companion. 'Arcanist, these are,-' Time seemed to blur as Fate listed the assembled Gods (of which there were a fair number, though the majority were from various dimensions besides the two currently involved in the Game, who were present mainly for the entertainment.)

When Fate finished, Arcanist looked around absently.

'Charmed.' He said briefly. 'And sorry we're late, I had some difficulty acquiring a suitable Champion and a whole host of other things came up I won't bore you with.'

Without further ado, he produced a tiny,-in fairness compared to the Table it was microscopic,-figurine and placed it near a small village near the Ramr River.

'Let's begin shall we?' He added eagerly.

_1. Fresh is a very relative term when it comes to air quality in Ankh-Morpork. The whole place smells of cess pits, rotten fish, decay and the Gods alone know what else. And that's on a good day. In high summer a breeze blowing from Ankh-Morpork has been known to cause violent nausea in people up to a hundred miles away._

**For the record:**

**The Arcanist is not an OC. He's a God in the lore of the pet-site Flight Rising.**

**This doesn't necessarily mean this is a multi-crossover, but the nature of the story let's us have some fun with cameos.**

**On that note, none of us have anything to do with Flight Rising beyond me (Blood Wolves) being a fan. We further more do not have any rights to any other IPs that appear or are cameoed in this story and are using them under the terms of Fair Use.**

**Beyond that, please read and review, give our other stories a look if you feel up to it and hopefully, we'll see you again soon.**

**'til next time!**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter II

Meanwhile, in Alagaesia

**Disclaimer: See Chapter One.**

**Authors' Notes:**

**Blood:** **I've started a forum where you can discuss this story. The link can be found in my profile for the curious.**

Lukas Thale was bored.

He had been recently assigned to this tiny village far away from the front lines, and while he was happy that there was no real risk of getting killed by a Varden agent there was nothing to _do_.

Every time he and the others had tried to sneak off to the bar their commanding officer had caught them and forced them to run around the village for 'drinking on duty'. So that was out. They weren't all that popular here either so it's not as if he could spend some time with one of the girls, so that was out. And ever since Markus had gotten his die stolen things had turned from 'tedious' to 'mind-numbingly boring' as they lost the only source of entertainment they had. Even counting the various countables, like the barrels and crates around the village, lost it's entertainment value as they memorized the exact placements over the weeks.

Angvard dammit, there wasn't even any crime around this place now, what with them being here. Bandits? What bandits? There weren't any damn bandits because no group is dumb enough to try and take on twenty, thirty Imperial soldiers and expect to come out sans losses, and no one wants to die so you've got zero bandit presence. Highwaymen were still around here, but the moment they hear four armored men coming up they scarper. Huh, never thought he would ever be wanting a fight; hell at least a fight would break up the monotony!

He grunted as he turned and began walking down the street, following the route he had been taking for the past few weeks. _Well, I shouldn't wish for something exciting to happen anyway. I just know that something like that is going to wind up biting me in the ass_. Oh, that was new.

An oddly dressed man with extremely dark skin, possibly a tribesman from the desert,-although he couldn't begin to fathom why one would be all the way out here without any significant amount of gold,-was walking down the street, evidently looking for something. _Well, might as well do the other aspects of my job_. "Oi! You there, what's your business?" He looked startled, and as he turned around Lukas saw a finely crafted bow with a quiver of arrows. _A hunter?_

"Ah! Hello, I am looking for a bowyer. Do you happen to know of any in this town?"

"Nah, people around these parts just pass their bows down along families or go to a bigger city. You won't be finding anything here." The man uttered a curse under his breath, evidently frustrated at having come out here for nothing. "Well, don't cause any trouble now, you hear?"

"Of course! That is a reasonable demand. Farewell." With that, the hunter turned and walked away, probably to the inn. It was getting late out after all, and why risk the night?

_Well, that was interesting. Now back to patrol One, two. One, two. One, two. One, two. One oh they fixed that water barrel two. One, two. One-oh Angvard yes. Yes. Yes._ Before him, out in the street, were two belligerent drunks and he was pretty sure more were inside the bar that he and the boys weren't allowed into courtesy of Officer Has-A-Twenty-Foot-Pole-Up-His-Ass. A nice little fight potential with no real permanent risk to him. Excellent; get the blood pumpin' a bit so that the next few hours won't be as bad.

Striding forward, the two drunks turned towards the sound of the clanking armor to see one of the more well-built Imperials walking towards them. They hesitated, brains still working through the alcoholic fog to decide on the course of action before Lukas took that choice out of their hands.

Reaching out he grabbed their heads, one in each hand, lifting them up so that they stood up straight before slamming their skulls together knocking them senseless. The two troublemakers dropped to the floor where they lay, groaning in pain. Lukas smiled, before sighing and bending over to grab their collars. Time to drag them to the lock up for a night.

Then a chair crashed through the window and slammed into his head.

* * *

><p>Cass smashed a chair off one of the bar patron's back. Her plan hadn't gone exactly how she wanted it. She was supposed to simply pickpocket the officer of the Imperial Soldiers for a message he received recently from his superiors (and to get some coins out of his little purse for herself).<p>

Cass ducked as the same drunken officer threw a punch towards her, only for him to miss as Cass slipped on some spilt beer on the floor and the officer tripping over her and crashing straight into a gang of fighting drunkards.

_Serves you right for getting too handy with me, _Cass thought, _now to get out of here without making things worse, certainly can't when an officer takes reaching for his purse means you want to bed him. _Cass made a rush for the inn door, almost everyone paid the robed Varden agent no heed. Cass yelped as she felt someone grab her brown ponytail.

"Oh no you don't!" The officer who had a bleeding nose and split lip used his strength to pull Cass back towards him. His eyes bulged wide as Cass used the momentum of the pull to enhance the blow from her elbow to his gut. The other patrons around them were busy, punching, kicking, smashing and brawling with one another to pay attention. The bartender was try to hide behind his stall

"Sorry, but I'm looking for a better man than a pervert." Cass smirked as tried to run again, only to be tackled to the ground by the officer again. He straddled her stomach as he wrapped his hands around her throat, everyone too busy or trying to avoid the chaos to interfere. Cass struggled to get the large man off her as he employed more pressure on her throat and force his weight on her stomach.

"I'm going enjoy watching your pretty emerald green eyes of yours go-" The officer screamed as a glass mug that was thrown smacked into the side of his face. He raised his hands to grasp his bleeding face. Cass used this opening to smack her forehead against his, knocking him down off her. She held her throat and tried to gain her breath as the officer laid fetal positioned next to her.

The fighting in the bar stopped entirely as a bellow rang in their ears.

"WHO THREW THAT CHAIR!?" Through the broken remains of the window a man could be seen, his form indistinct.

The inn owner pointed to the same officer on the ground who was trying to stand but failing spectacularly at it. The inn owner walked away from his stall and came closer to the centre of the room as the officer finally stood on his two feet.

The door burst open as another Imperial soldier rushed in, his shoulder pointed towards his target as he bowled into the officer. As the man lay groaning on the ground, the soldier in one smooth motion dragged the man back to his feet before slamming his fist into his superiors jaw. Not stopping there he kneed the dazed man in the gut before using one hand to grab his collar and another to grab at his belt, before picking up him up bodily and throwing him into the counter with a massive cry of exertion and rage. He then paused, blinking.

The inn owner and pretty much everyone in the inn looked at the man in complete shock. The slightly pudgy inn owner then spoke up again as he found his words,"He was also trying to harass this fine, kind lady here," the inn owner pointed to Cass who was sitting on the floor as she rubbed her neck,"she helped him when he was about to fall down the stairs but he kept making advances on her despite her refusal, I interfered in her honour and she interfere in mine when he threatened me."

The man seemed to be nodding absentmindedly as he examined the officer. He then pointed at the insensate man. "He's really, really drunk right?"

"He is incredibly so sir, he kept getting worse in his behaviour as he drank more mugs of ale," The inn owner answered, almost everyone not noticing Cass trying to sneak away quietly and slowly. "Pretty much a light weight if you ask me."

"Good." Turning around, he walked over to Cass, hugging her around the waist before picking her up, placing her back on her feet. "You alright miss?"

"Yes...um, I'm okay," Cass brushed her short cloak down as tried to avoid eye contact."Just a little shaken from near death by strangulation inside an inn… not really the first and quite possibly be won't be the last time it will happen to be honest. I'm Cassenda, and you are?"

"Lukas Thale. Now if you'll excuse me," he turned back to the officer and picked him up like a sack of grain, slinging him over one shoulder.

Cass nodded respectfully as she headed towards the back of the inn. The inn owner scratched his bearded chin as he frowned his eyes at her back. He pulled a piece of paper out of his apron and looked at it, his eyes went wide as he recognised something.

"Stop her! She's a wanted thief in the Empire's capital!" A man who was looking over the inn owner's shoulder shouted while pointing at Cass," The reward is 820 crowns for her!"

Cass grabbed the nearest chair and flung it at a nearby window, the glass shattering as the chair smashed through it. Cass sprinted for the window and leapt through it as the inn patrons slowly stormed towards her as their delayed reactions wore off.

Lukas's reaction was slower, throwing the prone body of his officer at her a second too late, the body slamming against the wall useless. He instantly began to run as well, grabbing at the bell at his belt and ringing it as loudly as he could; the noise spreading out all over town. Similar sounds began to ring out as distant shouts of other watchmen began to be heard.

"Stupid bad luck!" Cass muttered to herself as she sprinted down the street, she took a turn an alleyway as some guards were about to come around the corner ahead of her. She looked around for something to disguise herself with or to hide in. She then saw a barrel that contain some local flowers and herbs; she took off her cloak and wrapped it around her mouth as climbed into the barrel. She ensure that the flowers and herbs were over her head as she snuggled herself into the barrel.

_Well at least I've got this nice smelling plants to take my mind off this whole affair, _She thought cheerfully as she pulled out the message scroll that she stole from the officer as well as his purse, _and I managed to do the job and get extra benefits to boot, nothing could-_

The top of the barrel was sealed shut, hammering of nails made Cass pause in her thoughts. Then she grunted as the she felt the barrel being tip onto its side and then being rolled. She felt nauseous as the barrel was quickly rolled down the alleyway to cart filled with hay in which Lukas was inspecting at that moment.

The barrel was lifted into the cart, both man trying to pick it up seemed puzzled at the weight of it as it settle up right in the hay.

"Sir, do you honestly believe someone would hide in this hay?" The cart owner, a woman in her forties asked Lukas as she wrapped her capel tighter around herself as a strong, cold breeze passed by them.

"I've seen men hide in sewage and….other things before." Lukas grunted as he sifted through the hay with his sword, carefully moving the blade to and fro.

"Well I'm transporting herbal materials for healing purposes to the capital," The old woman said with a scowling expression. "If the thief was trying to hide in my cart I'd kick her skinny hide off it and turn her in."

"Good to hear ma'am. Well, everything seems to be in order, I won't delay you any further."

The lid of the barrel moved slightly but didn't budge as Cass tried to open it slowly, listening in on the twos' discussion outside the barrel. She looked at a tiny circle in the wall of the barrel. Cass pushed the wooden cork out and then gazed out the freshly made peephole to see what was going on. She smirked as Lukas walked near the side of the cart, heading on ahead, hopefully away from her. What she didn't expect to see next were a pair of black eyes suddenly appearing in the corner of her vision and staring right back at her own green eyes.

One thought went through her head. _Cass' bad fortune strikes again._

The eyes blinked, then disappeared from view. A moment later, a scrap of paper was shoved into the hole with one word: _Why?_

Cass paused for a moment. She wasn't sure as to how to answer back, and even if she could find the answer, she couldn't write back because she didn't how to write.

"What are you doing back there?!" The old woman shouted at the person that Cass couldn't see probably.

A thick, heavily accented voice replied and through the hole she could see some rather exotic clothing. "Your barrel has a hole in it, ma'am! I was simply plugging it as best as I could."

"Ah, for… I bet some lowlife stole some of those herbs." The old woman sounded distress before getting ready to get the cart moving.

"If I may ask, where are you headed? Perhaps we could travel together, if our destinations be the same."

The old woman was about to reply before the wheel of the cart got caught in a deep murky puddle. She yelped as she tried to balance herself on the cart. The cart's weight shafted; making the barrel fall off the cart and onto the street. It smashed apart revealing its contents, Cass groaned in pain as she grabbed the back of her head and slowly got up.

"What the?!" The old woman jumped off the cart and ran in the direction in which Lukas was heading to. Cass rubbed her eyes as tried to regain her sense of things. She looked at the strange man before her.

"So who are you? I never seen anyone like you around, especially with eyes like that." Cass asked as she looked around for somewhere to hide.

The man clapped his hand to his chest as he spoke, and now Cass was seeing him clearly she could see a high-quality bow and a quiver on his back, as well as his dark skin and the rather simple gold patterns on his face. "I be Ululaik, chiefest hunter of the Haru-laik clan. I hail from the Hadarac. What of you?"

"Cassenda, bastard clanless vagabond. Hailing from the slums of Urû'baen." Cass answered grimly as she saw nowhere to escape or hide fast enough before the guards came back for her.

The man tilted his head. "Vagabond? Do you mean that you steal from others?"

Cass sighed, she could guess he was probably against such a thing."Yes, beats the other choices to survive…certainly prefer a life of being on my own then being alongside others in the slums."

"I see." He nodded once, then tilted his head again as he seemed to analyze her, his expression unreadable. Then, he turned around and rapidly climbed up the wall of one of the houses, before standing on the edge. "Come with me, or you may turn yourself into your Imperial justice system."

Cass stared dumbfounded at the Ululaik before climbing up after him. "This Hadarac homeland of yours Uluk must be very far away from here," She pulled herself onto the roof and stood next to him. "Or the idea of money to your culture mustn't have much meaning at all… thank you, not many show kindness to my ilk simply for the sake of it."

"Do not misunderstand my actions for approval of your own. I simply understand that circumstances may force one to commit deeds that they'd rather not." Ululaik then turned. "And it is here where I wonder: When do you plan to stop? You appear to be healthy, well fed, and properly clothed. Is there some other reason or cause for which you steal?"

"... there is reason but I can't tell you what it is or who my employers are. I can only hope one day I can get enough crowns for… a personal dream of mine. Maybe then I will stop," Cass replied, she crossed her arms and looked down below at the street where several guards were searching for her. "What about you? Why are you here, is there something you want to do first before settling down with a childhood love or did your clan send you here for a purpose?"

"My clan requires items, bows to be exact. Of a make that we cannot properly obtain in our current state. I have come to the Empire to find suitable replacements, for many of our hunters were left bereft of weapons after an….incident." Ululaik crossed his arms. "In any case, very well." He pointed out across the rooftops. "Follow these roofs, but stay away from the larger houses or the markets. There are in-place ladders and windows that the guards may use to get to your position. Stay near the center of the town as well; they may fire arrows at you from the walls and towers. The East gatehouse has a faulty lock and latch. It should be little trouble for one like you to bypass it."

"Thanks, good luck on your quest and here," Cass tossed the purse that she stole from the officer to Uluk," In case you need it for emergencies, just make no-one see it in your grasp." Cass followed the direction Uluk pointed out for her to go.

Uluk watched her leave, then looked down at the swirling, moving mass of guards, and lastly at the sack of gold in his hands. He stared at it, before pocketing it with a sigh. "Hopefully I will not be forced into using this."

* * *

><p>Narsil strode down the road, noting how the scenery had changed since the last time he'd been this way.<p>

It had been ten,-no,-twenty years?

It was difficult to remember, he moved about so often, but at least these days he didn't need to worry about Morzan swooping down on him.

A strange feeling in the air made him pause and a faint susurration too faint for Human ears to hear made him detour off the road, using his steel-shod staff to push the brush out of his way.

He came to a small clearing and a greasy feeling in the air made him think of magic.

The clearing didn't seem natural, the strange patterns in the dirt notwithstanding.

At the epicentre a strange grey, red and blue creature the size of a hawk, with elaborate frills and eyes the colour of ice hovered, flapping its wings and blinking, head cocked in puzzlement.

Abruptly the greasy feeling vanished, leaving Narsil face to face with the creature.

It blinked in his direction, but made no move to glide closer, just observing him thoughtfully.

Narsil licked his lips and lowered his hood slowly, before saying with the precision of someone long out of practice:

"I mean you no harm, little one." In the Ancient Language.

The creature blinked again.

"Oh…?" It said in a monotone frills lowering slightly.

That wasn't all that surprising. Everything knew and understood that 'Oh?' or any variation there of, could only be a request for clarification, preferably in a more understandable language.

Narsil was about to try again, but stopped as the creature spoke:

"What are you?" It asked in the same monotone, frills pricking forward.

Now it was Narsil's turn to blink stupidly.

Despite speaking in a dead monotone, this creature spoke Common, albeit with a strange and unplaceable accent.

"I am Narsil, of the elves." He responded, trying vainly not to sound flustered. "What are you?" He asked.

The creature blinked, head and frills cocking at odd angles.

"You have never seen a fae dragon before?" The dragon asked, frills flicking again, still in that dead monotone. It was almost unnerving.

If Narsil had been any other elf, he would've fallen to his knees in awe.

However, having actually met a few dragons before the Fall and not giving a care for elven decorum to start with ever since he'd been banished from the woods, he could only feel mild surprise.

It was self-evident really:

Despite the tracery of gold on the dragon's dark blue wings and frills, it had the characteristic six limbs and serpentine neck and tail. The only problem was it was so small as to have been able to sit on his shoulder with no trouble.

He noticed that what he'd taken for red colouration was actually a loose-fitting tunic. Curious.

"What is your name?" He asked. If the dragon's behaviour so far was any indication, it was confused, so figuring out how it got here would have to wait until some other time.

"I am Patientia." The dragon replied, frills flicking forward as she nodded in a way that for reasons Narsil wasn't quite certain of, made him certain the dragon was female. "Where am I?" She asked.

"A couple of hours' walk from the town of Bullridge." Narsil replied. "Perhaps you would like to travel with me and I can tell you more?" He offered.

Patientia's frills flicked as she thought, before they pricked forward again.

"Very well." She said simply and flitted down to perch on Narsil's shoulder.

He braced himself unconsciously, then cursed himself internally.

This was a wild dragon. Why the hell had he thought there was even a remote possibility contact would trigger a bond?

With some effort, Narsil found his way back to the road, then took up a light jog as he began educating Patientia on Alagaesia.

**Yes, this is one hell of a lot faster than usual in terms of my usual updates, but that's mainly down to the fact that my co-authors are really fast writers, I can write quickly when I put my mind to it and this is an enormously fun project we've got going here.**

**Next chapter is when things start to get interesting.**

**Please review, favourite or what-have-you and we'll see you next time.**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter III

First Moves

**Disclaimer: See Chapter One.**

"I'd forgotten how quickly these games could move, even when not all the Champions were in play." Angvard mused as his first Champion hauled his erstwhile superior into the lock-up.

"Indeed." Fate said lazily. "I'll skip my turn for the moment, my Champion would be of little real use at present." He added. "Errata?"

The Goddess of misunderstandings pulled a token depicting a brown-haired dwarf from a belt-purse and put it immediately in the path of Sindri's and Arcanist's Champions.

"Lady?" Errata asked, motioning to the board.

Without missing a beat, the Lady placed her Champions,-a woman wearing several layers of clothes and showing as little skin as possible and a Ankh-Morpork watchman,-not far from where Angvard's second Champion was climbing down a building, having escaped arrest.

"Grey-Eyed Destiny." The Lady stated.

Fate's Alagaesian counterpart smiled.

"Much like your friend there dear Lady, I think I'll skip my turn at present." He said, leaning back in his seat. "I nominate Bilious." He added afterward.

The Discworld's God of Hangovers proceeded to place both of his Champions down in the cellar of the town's inn.

* * *

><p>Thumper opened the sewer lid in the dark corner of an alleyway. He slowly and carefully lowered the sack in first which Granite was held in, he snored loudly in his sleep as Thumper carefully climbed down the ladder.<p>

The golem pursed his lips as he pretended to whistle, his almost rockhard feet moved down the bars of the ladder one at a time. The dark cramped surroundings forced the golem to look upwards.

Then his next step missed a bar. Thumper slipped down, the bar in his grip suddenly disappeared. The golem yelled as he felt himself dragged down by the weight of troll and the suddenly gone ladder made his and Granite's plummet unstoppable.

Thumper closed his eyes for a second and found that the wet, slimy and decrepit stonework was gone and replaced with a light coloured wooden ceiling, walls and beams. Then came a thud followed by sound of wood snapping and cracking.

Thumper shook his head and saw red water-like liquid splashing along the floor. He then felt something smack against his back repeatedly.

"Get off, get off!" Granite cried as he struggled underneath the golem's back, as the sack absorbed the liquid.

Thumper threw his arms forward and pulled himself up off Granite. He turned around and saw that he and Granite had landed on what was once an unopened beer keg, he sighed as he gripped the sack near the bottom corner. He gave a powerful pull and Granite came out of it in one go.

"What in the name of... this isn't the sewer, Thumper how could you get lost!?" Granite asked bewildered as he looked around the room.

"I didn't, we were just entering the sewer system a few seconds ago and then the ladder… vanished." Thumper rubbed his fingers against his brawny forehead, tiny bits of harden clay crumbled off.

"Don't scratch your head! You know that's bad for you…" Granite looked over at the beer barrels, his stone lips tightening together as he looked at the symbol on the kegs, "I think a god is messing with us since I don't remember any empire on our travels, and I don't think someone would pull the same trick like this, twice."

The golem simply picked the troll up and moved towards the exit of the cellar, "Either way, we are not staying down here, better to deal with whoever is doing this to us with you sober."

"Oh boyo, you always have to be serious one of us." Granite rolled his eyes as the golem set him down near the cellar door. Thumper gently grabbed the handle of the cellar door and raised a finger up to his lip and nose.

Suddenly the cellar door tugged up, Thumper's grip prevented it from opening.

"What the… Char get the pitchfork!" Thumper and Granite looked at one another, their mouths slightly opened as looked around quickly for an escape route. "We've got some vagabonds drinking the ale again!"

Thumper closed his eyes and sighed, Granite rolled his head a bit and cringed as Thumper slowly loosen his grip on the cellar handle. As soon as his little finger let go, the cellar door shot open.

A pudgy bald man and a skinny teenager with a pitchfork looked at the two at the top of the cellar steps. The two stared wide eyed in complete silence, the teenager dropped the pitchfork as both groups looked at one another in silence.

Thumper raised his hand and waved, "Hi."

The man backed away in shock as the teenager bolted away. The boy screamed as he dashed through the grass towards the town centre.

"What… what is… what are… why-" The bald man fainted, landing in the grass with a thud. Thumper looked at the unconscious man in both surprise and awe.

"Huh, nearly everyone I meet just goes, 'meh' when they see my uniform," The golem looked up to the sky, the clouds blotted out the sun.

"Looks like we can move around without concern for little ol' me," Granite remarked, he peeped his head out of the cellar door and noticed two cloaks. He tapped the back of his hand against Thumper's shoulder and pointed at the cloaks as soon as the golem looked, "Thank they'd fit us?"

Thumper moved his head closer and squinted, "They are rather big for humans but I don't see why…" Thumper looked to the troll next to him who cocked his head towards the unconscious man, "You really think a god sent us to a place where humans haven't seen a golem?"

"Either that or we're in a town that is racist and outright scared of trolls and golems," The troll and golem walked out of the cellar and threw on the cloaks. They covered their heads and faces with the hoods and moved towards the town, "Now, let's do some eavesdropping and find out where we are and how do we get out of here without gettin' the sledge to either of us."

* * *

><p>"So let me get this straight: There were two stone monsters inside your cellar that may or may not have been at the alcohol, and you want us to go check it out?" The pair in front of him nodded and Lukas scratched his head.<p>

"Hm. Well, you do know that if you're pulling our legs there are going to be consequences right? I mean any other time sure we'll go check it out, but right now there is a known thief on the loose in town and every man is on alert." Lukas drummed the table as he spoke. Usually the threat of repercussion was enough to dissuage attention seekers and liars, so he was surprised when the two in front of him resolutely nodded in confirmation. _Huh, they're really serious about this._

He sighed, then stood up. "Oi! Baldrik! Take over the watch for me!" He turned back to the father-son duo. "Alright you two, lead the way. But if this turns out to be all just one big trick, then you're going in the lock up for a few hours, understand?"

The two hesitated before nodding again, and Lukas was properly paying attention as he followed the two to their home. If someone was willing to go to the lockup based on what he or she saw, then its a safe bet that he or she really believed in it. This was worrying as the two men in front of him were fairly healthy and seemed right in the head.

The two waited nervously as he combed the grounds, checking the outside of the house before going into the cellar. His eyes were instantly drawn to the broken barrel, and he was still thinking as he climbed out.

"Alright, you two: I'm going to believe you. The barrel is broken and I don't think that wasting a perfectly good brew is in either of your interests just for a joke. I'm going off now to see if I can't follow up on this, but report back to the watch house if you see anything else suspicious. Understand?" Without waiting for an answer, he began moving off.

_Great. Nothing for weeks, and now everything comes on us at once; Hey what the-?! Why are there two women-oh you have got to be shitting me. Well, may as well check._

Quietly, he motioned to one of the other soldiers on the street, surreptitiously nodding in the direction of the roof-goers. Judging from the man's reaction, he got the message.

* * *

><p>Alice inhaled as she pushed herself off the rough tiling of the roof top. She patted down her coat and slipped her hands into the pockets. The witch hummed as she walked towards the rooftop entrance, eyes closed.<p>

Then she felt her teeth rattle and her long, pointed ears twitch.

Alice turned her head and opened her sharp blue eyes. She gasped as she took in her surroundings, she was no longer in Ankh-Morpork. All of the clay coloured or pale white buildings were replaced with older and somewhat shabbier buildings that seemed to fit the older days of Ankh-Morpork.

"Watch out!" A female voice cried out to Alice who turned to see a brown haired pony-tailed woman dressed in clothing suited for an explorer about to crash into her whilst she jumped from another higher rooftop.

The warning came too late as the woman smacked into Alice, the two grunted in pain as they trembled onto the ground in a heap.

"Ah, what the… what the bleeding colours of magic were you doing?" Alice asked the woman as she pushed her gently off her chest. The woman sat down and shook her head as her dazement wore off. Alice adjusted her oversized scarf around her neck before the woman spoke.

"I was trying to get across a gap between the rooftops, sorry for … landing on you," The woman stood up, she pulled the hood of her cloak over her head and offered Alice her hand with a nervous smile, "The name's Carosa by the way."

Alice took her hand and was pulled up onto her feet, "Alice, and Carosa isn't your real name." The hooded woman looked at the shorter Alice, perplexed at what she meant."Your whole demeanour gives it away, you're not a good liar. So… what is your real name?"

The hooded woman sighed,"It's Cassenda… I guess this means I've been finally caught, one shout from you and the guards swarm these rooftops before I can even jump to the next one."

"Caught? For what, being a thief or assassin without membership in the guilds?" Alice asked, the witch frowned as she looked at the surroundings as she tried to picture everything that had happened so far together.

"... Guilds? What do- how-? How would there be guilds for assassins and thieves?" Cassenda questioned back, her confusions evident by her expression and hand that scratched her through her brown hair.

"...Apparently this isn't Ankh-Morpork…" Alice's eyes widened as she took in her surroundings again and then Cassenda, she realised that Cassenda's attire had designs and style that would not be native to the Disc.

"Ankh-Morpork… sounds like a city that's well known…" Cassenda gulped as she realised what the situation was, she noticed Alice's ears as they parted through her long flowing hair, "From wherever you came from, elf."

Alice looked up at Cassenda, her sharp blue eyes had a sense of cheerfulness that were not there before,"You met elves, as in actual elves?"

Cassenda's deep green eyes looked right and left as she tried to take in everything, "... Yes, I've met a few, though from your words it sounds like they're a rare thing to meet..."

Alice smiled as she put her arm around Cassenda's shoulder, "I think we should walk and talk, you tell me about this… place and I'll tell you about mine." Both of them walked on towards the next rooftop. The nearly five footed witch who wore an oversized, colourful coat,scarf and pointed hat smiled with the larger sized cloak wearing thief whose clothes were darker and more rugged than her new companion's were.

"What the…." they heard a voice from behind them. Turning, they saw a large man clad in the uniform of the soldiers wandering the town clambering onto the roof. He had stopped, though, staring at the two with wide eyes. Then, he shouted. "Hey! You, stop right there!"

Alice and Cassenda looked at the man briefly before they dashed as fast as possible away from him, "Friend of yours?" Alice asked as she followed after Cassenda.

"Nope, just a really determined Imperial soldier." Cassenda leapt towards the next rooftop, she climbed up and reached out her hand to Alice who leapt after her.

"A soldier! You really must've taken something important to get one's attention!" Alice remarked as the two ran towards the next ledge.

They could hear the man swearing behind them, along with the clanks of metallic objects being dropped to the floor. Then their pursuer shouted, with a volume that would have put a drill sergeant to shame.

"OVER HERE! SHE'S ON THE ROOFTOPS! YOU LOT, GO AND SEAL OFF THE LADDERS ON THIS BLOCK! HURRY!"

Alice looked over the streets, she bit down on her lip and her hands grasped open and shut, "Right… Cassenda follow my lead and trust me on this," the air next to the ledge started to go misty and cold, "despite me not knowing what the heck I'm doing…" Alice mumbled to herself as held onto something deep in her coat's pocket.

Alice leapt towards the misty and cold air, to Cassenda's utter surprise a thin sloping path of ice formed above the street. Alice waved her hand as she balanced and slid down the icy slide, Cassenda squinted her eyes as she thought she saw Alice's skin become paler and her body shiver ferociously, "Come on before it breaks and melts on you!"

Cassenda lept onto the ice and struggled to balance herself, she looked behind herself to see the ice break and melt behind her, the mist and cold disappearing as the two moved away from the guards.

"Oh that's just bullshit." The soldier had stopped and was glaring at them from across the street.

Cassenda laughed until Alice shouted, "Brace yourself!"

Alice raised her arms as the icy path was over a cart of hay, an Imperial officer set the hay on fire. The heat from the burning cart and hay started to melt and break the ice. Cassenda looked down at the man who smirked back up at her, it was the same man who punched the Imperial officer in the inn, "That son of a-"

The two flew off the ice slide as it crumbled and melted from the heat, they crashed through the upper story windows of the house that overlooked the burning cart. Alice tried to stand but stumbled as the servants in the house scattered out of the room she and Cassenda crashed into. Cassenda crawled over to a nearby table and used it pull herself up with a groan of pain, "Well I've got hand it to Lukas, he's got a sharp mind."

They then heard shouts beneath them as a familiar voice rang out. "Alright you two, give it up! We got the building surrounded and we're prepared for any tricks you might have! Just give up and you might get off with a lighter sentence!" The thuds of the boots were coming closer.

Alice put her hands on Cassenda's shoulder, "Right, I'm going to use a illusion trick my mother taught me, just dash as quick as possible as it will wear off very quickly. Wait, until they open the door and come into the room, okay."

Cassenda simply nodded back, her eyes wide in fear and dread but was ready none the less, "So what is this trick exactly?"

Alice didn't get the chance to reply as the door burst off of it's hinges under the weight and force of five fully armored soldiers, Lukas among them, charging into the room. Lukas had been performing a leap as he entered the room and flew towards Cassenda's waist, while three piled on top of Alice. The last hung back, guarding the door.

"Get off me!" Cassenda shouted, the guard at the door stared wide eyed and clasped his hand to his mouth.

"Ah… sir… did you just tackle a frail, old woman?" The guard at the door questioned as he rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably.

"Who you calling frail young man?" Alice shouted back as she tried to move the guards off her, "Now get off me you three, my bones are aching from ye flatten me!"

Lukas grunted, shifting to ensure that Cassenda couldn't move underneath him. "Alright, first off Sheldrick don't call me sir, I'm only officer for a day until Officer Poleass gets sober again. Second, sorry lady but you're a caster which means, Allen?"

One of the men on top of her, a short heavyset man with two scars across his face shoved a rag into Alice's face, covering her mouth and nose.

Alice slapped her hand hard on the ground and a loud crack was heard. Everything in the room started to float weightlessly upwards except Alice who grinned like a mad woman.

Cassenda grabbed onto Alice's sleeve as the witch walked across to the door. The witch grunted with effort as she trudged towards the guard that struggled onto holding a grip on the doorframe.

Alice gave the man a heavy backhanded slip to his face. The man reached up to his face and screamed as he spiralled to the ceiling outside the door.

"Ah...Alice could you hand me something to get this fella off me?" Cassenda pushed and kicked at Lukas who still held onto her as they fought weightlessly. He was glaring at the scarred man, presumably Allen.

"Allen you damned idiot! You grabbed the wrong bottle didn't you?"

"Oh come on, you gave us less than a second before you were dragging us out the door with that alarm!" At this point one of the other men, who appeared to have a bad eye piped in.

"Dammit Allen you had one job! One job, man!"

"Oh piss off Chenny."

Cassenda finally managed to get Lukas off her by attempting to poke at his eyes with her fingers. He raised his hand up to guard his eyes, Cassenda took the opportunity to grab his other hand, pry it off her shirt and then spun him around as Alice walked down the stairs.

Cassenda laughed as Lukas span around weightlessly at the height of the stairs, she blew him a mocking kiss before resting her hand behind her head as she held onto Alice's sleeve still as they neared towards the exit of the house. As they left Lukas shouted at them.

"This isn't over you bitch!"

As soon as Alice left the house Cassenda fell flat on the ground with a thud, She shook her head and patted herself down, "So how long are they stuck like that Alice?"

"Until they all manage to get themselves outside the house or wait for an hour or two." Alice replied, she panted as sweat beads flowed down her forehead and brows. The two started to move away from the house as quickly as possible. "Now let's see if we can get ourselves some disguises before they manage to get themselves out of the house." Alice said as she struggled to move quickly, Cassenda put Alice's arm around her shoulder and helped her move quicker.

* * *

><p>Richard strode on through the dank alleyway of the poorer district of Ankh-Morpork. His pet companion sniffed as it took in the smells. The watchman lit his pipe as he peered around at the empty street.<p>

He closed his eyes as he took a puff of the pipe, he opened them to see a small but wide puddle in front of him. Richard then noticed Alfie attempts at playing with everything in front of herself, Richard smiled until Alfie splashed into the puddle.

The knee high dragon-like creature yelped as she sank into the puddle,"Alfie!" Richard shouted as he sprinted towards the puddle, he reached his burnt scarred hand down into the water.

His eyes widen in shock as he felt nothing but a breeze on the other side of the puddle. Richard shook his head and stood up. He jumped onto the puddle and fell in through it.

He grunted as his feet hit solid ground, his legs braced for such an impact. Richard shook his legs for several minutes before he surveyed his surroundings.

"Huh, looks cleaner than the district." Richard grumbled to himself as he walked out towards the entrance of the alley. Then he heard a familiar hooting noise, "Alfie!"

The watchman ran until he was out in the middle of the street. His mouth hung open and he barely managed to catch the pipe he was smoking from. The streets were like those of the older Ankh-Morpork's days but somehow much nicer to look at.

The same hooting noise made him turn to the source. Alfie stood atop of a crate near a house with broken windows on the second floor.

Richard grinned as he strode on towards Alfie, the creature reared and shook its tail like a dog would. Alfie dashed towards the watchman, her claws grasped onto his breastplate as long serpentine like body coiled around his torso. She snuggled her head next to his arm and purred loudly.

"Alright, alright Alfie," Richard laughed as he playfully wrestled his pet companion off himself. The black dragon like creature whirled around as she was landed on the wet, muddy path."No need for the gratitude, you know I'd keep your company through thick and thin."

Alfie chirped then sharply turned her snout to the house nearby, two small frills along her neck shook fiercely as her body crouched low. Richard frowned his eyes as he observed the building, "...magic.."

The watchman moved cautiously towards the entrance of the house. He pulled out his small crossbow from the satchel slung over his shoulder.

Richard pushed himself against the wall near the door and slowly moved towards the doorway, Alfie crouched next to him, they both moved quietly as possible. Richard patted his pants, Alfie looked up to see her master point his index and middle fingers at the door.

Alfie moved ahead of Richard and leaned her head into the doorway, she then made a whistling sound which made Richard lower his crossbow and rubbed his dark brown widow's peak. He walked casually before he stopped at the doorway.

Before him was a room filled with objects that floated to the ceiling or moved slowly in mid-air, "Huh, magic indeed…" Richard squinted his eyes as he spotted an armoured man with black hair, beard and a nasty scar that ran across the bridge of nose and across his left eye who attempted to move down the stairway by slowly grabbing the railings and pulling himself down. "Sir is there any rope around? It will make getting down much easier for you."

The man continued to slowly make his way down as he spoke. "There's a bundle of rope outside, but not as if we can get to it. Bloody mages…." He craned his neck upwards to try and look at him. "You know, I'd really appreciate it if you could go and grab it, give me and my mates a bit of a hand." He blinked when he finally managed to get a good glance at his speech partner. "...the fuck?"

"I'll get it, be back in a minute or so," Richard answered, he tipped his copper helmet to the man before leaving the doorway to look for the rope.

A few seconds later Richard returned to the doorway with a bundled rope. He crouched down and motioned for Alfie to bite down on the end of the rope.

Alfie bit down as Richard picked up the draconian creature in his arms and stood at the door way, "Alright Sir. I need you to catch Alfie here when I toss her to you and then to help her get to another one of your lads."

"One," Richard prepped himself to throw, "Two," Alfie tensed up as it prepared to jump as soon as her master threw her, "And...three!"

Richard swung Alfie towards the man, his pet companion leapt from his arms as soon as the toss was almost done.

The man caught Alfie, staring at her dumbly before blurting out, "What the fuck? The hell is this?" He held out Alfie at arms length, staring as if he had never seen anything like her before.

"I think she's a dragon… though the lads back at the Watch headquarters say she ain't no swamp dragon they've ever seen." Richard wrapped the other end of the rope around his wrist as he started to whistle to himself.

The man held onto Alfie, before finally looking at Richard. "This is a dragon."

Richard simply shrugged and showed the man his scarred, burnt hand,"Well if she can spit fire better than a swamper can...then yes, I guess she is a dragon. So you gonna toss her to the next bloke or not?"

"An actual, living dragon."

"Well, her and the other ones are tiny in comparison to that big red one that burnt the Watch house down," Richard whistled in amazement as he tugged the rope a bit. Alfie squirmed in the man's grip.

The man jolted and began moving to toss her down to his compatriots, but paused, then turned back around to Richard. "Wait, there are more dragons where you come from?" His eyes were wide.

"Ah don't worry, wizards blokes say that the big dragon was a once off thing." Alfie started to hiss fiercely at the man.

The man looked back at Alfie, starting as if he couldn't believe he was holding her. "Wait, sorry, but before I let you go." He then looked back at Richard. "Alright, while I'm getting over the fact that I have an actual, living dragon in my hands, where did you say you were from again?"

"Well… Ankh-Morpork, sir."

"Alright, now where is Ankh-Morpork? Like the name by the way, lot more interesting than Bullridge."

Richard looked at the man with a raised eyebrow, "Bullridge? Now I know that a wizard was foolin' around with that puddle I jumped into, well Ankh-Morpork is more or less on Sto plain of the Disc my good fellow."

"Alright, if a wizard was involved then a lot more makes sense. So, let me tell you this bluntly: The dragons here are all dead, and everyone who had one is dead, and I'm pretty sure most of the people who had connections to those other people are dead as well."

"That's a shame," Richard remarked as Alfie was tossed to the next person, "it is horrible when the little blighters blow up, must of been one big gatherin' for everyone bloke or lass who owned one to die. "

"Here's the thing: All those dragons were, like, big. You know, the kind knights kill in fairy tales or that the Dragon Riders used to ride around. Before they all got slaughtered."

Richard lowered his arms as he looked up at the man in bewilderment, "Are ya sayin' people who own actual big flyin' dragons were killed… how exactly do ya pull off killin' someone who owns a pet that can use ya as a toothpick or roast ya like chicken."

"When you got a dragon and you got a bunch of buddies who also have dragons. The bloke that killed off all of em is still around, in power. He rules this Empire. And you have a dragon. Make the connection?"

Richard rubbed his stubbe covered chin before he pointed at Alfie who was tossed to the next guard, "She's tiny though, Alfie is about as dangerous as a trained guard dog," as of that moment a belch was heard and guard yelped in surprise as cone of sparks and flames nearly missed his head. "...theoretically speaking of course."

"Well, I can see that! And my buddies back there would be able to see that too. We got drafted, we don't give a shit about the King or whatever he wants. But sooner or later you're gonna have an idiot greenhorn or some jingo with shit for brains who blabs, And then things are going to go to hell. Oh, speaking of which." It was then that he finally sent Alfie down to the other room, where violent swearing and the name Lukas could be heard. Swearing that abruptly cut off when Alfie tumbled in.

"Thanks for the warning," Richard gripped the his end of the rope tightly, "Now, before I pull you and your lads down, could you describe the bloke or lass who cast this… unique gravitational upset spell on the house?"

"Didn't get a good look at her, she had some sort of illusion on herself that made her look like an old woman. She had a companion though, names Cassenda I think. Wanted thief, the guards ought to be putting up posters and if they aren't when I get down I'll thrash the lot of those useless louts."

"Hmm… looks like ye are dealing with a witch, that or a gender confused wizard." Richard hummed away as he started to pull on the rope.

The man looked at him oddly. "What's the difference between a witch and a wizard? Both use magic, don't they? I mean, I guess you could do the gender thing, but that's just being pedantic."

"I really don't know, though my uncle who's a wizard claims witches prefer to do somethin' called 'Headology', whatever that is…" Richard moved backwards out of the doorway to allow room for the guards through. "That and they prefer not to use magic that much apparently."

As the four of them passed through, one of the men in the back spoke up. "So…..Lukas. You gonna explain things to us? You know, like why there is a fucking dragon here?"

"Yes, Allen, I will, now shut up. You don't get to talk when you grabbed the wrong bottle."

"It's a damn accident! It's not as if you didn't screw up before remember that thing with the captains horse?"

"I said you don't get to talk Allen."

"You lads might want to try and position your feet near the ground now." As soon as the last end of the rope which Alfie held onto with her teeth came through, the spell wore off.

"Oof!" The men were still in the middle of properly positioning themselves when they fell to the ground, grunting before clambering back up. The man with the scars, Lukas from what the others had called him gathered them all around. "Alright, so what's your name friend?"

"Richard Glimma sir, and your's is Lukas right?"

"Yup. Alright Richard, I think it's going to be in your best interest to keep the dragon out of sight as much as possible. What's her name anyway?"

"Alfie… I thought she was a male when I found her…" Richard stretched his the back of his neck in embarrassment, "...actually I'm still not sure if she's a boy or a lass. So have there been other like myself and your witch around here?"

Lukas shrugged, as did the others. "Don't know, to be honest. We had a report of some stone men, though, you know anything?"

"I can either assume that your are either talking about the folks around here seein' golems or trolls… neither are exactly the type of folk you want to enrage if their opposite of ya."

"Dammit. Alright guys, who has the armory key again?"

"It ought to be back at base."

"Alright" He turned to Richard, "Thanks mate. You want to tag along, sure, you want to leave, fine. We aint gonna stop you and we don't expect you to help us more than you already have."

Richard dusted off his watchman's coat, "Might as well tag along with you lads. After all, golems and trolls can be talked with if you know what you are doing, that and I'm far from home here and needs to know the rules before I go anywhere."

"Sure, let's move out. Oh, and here." Lukas took off his cloak and handed it to Richard. "You can wrap Alfie up in it or just use it to hide her if you want."

Richard took the cloak and whistled for Alfie, the small dragon approached him and was picked up and wrapped in the cloak. The watchman carried the small dragon in his arms as he followed the guards, "Thank you Lukas, and could you describe this Cassenda lady to me? May help ye if we come across her and her friend."

"Sure. She has green eyes, tan skin, dark brown hair, and is kinda hot."

"Oh boy, attraction to a criminal… my boss, Vimes, wouldn't approve of such a thing." Richard gave a chuckle.

"Hey, give me some credit now-I'm not dumb or inexperienced enough to literally lose the skin off my back just because I wanted to sleep with a thief."

Richard shrugged, "Don't worry, I know you're smarter and wise enough not to do something a rookie would do. Well, at least she'd probably get a separate jail cell from blokes and okay food to eat… you did try tell her that when you were going to arrest her before the witch performed her magic didn't you?"

All four of the guardsmen stared at him before Allen grunted. "We are all idiots."

"Well, we did say we would give them a lighter sentence."

"She had an eight hundred crown bounty, a lighter sentence may not mean much."

Richard's forehead clinched in a frown as he thought hard on about the criminal they were talked about, "Maybe she's had a spell in a prison once, the kind of prison that makes you really, really dedicated to staying out of any kind ever again. Just a theory of course, there's also a possibility that she has a secret that could make things worse for her."

Lukas's face twisted as he thought, before the light of revelation dawned on his face. "Gil'ead. If she did a stint in Gil'ead, or even just took a tour there, without any experience from other Imperial prisons…."

One of the taller men, a redhead with a broken nose scowled. "Then for her prison may as well be death."

* * *

><p>After abandoning any hope left to getting his cart to the nearest town Vaughn had decided to backtrack up the road from where he originally came from, remembering passing a small village not too long ago and hoping to find some assistance from the people living there, like maybe buying a new horse.<p>

As he was walking along the dirt path he suddenly stopped as he noticed ahead of him a strange sight, a wall of mist was creeping along the road in front of him and was coming down towards where he was standing.

While mist was just a average part of every day weather, not unlike the year of the raining fish eyes and snake tails, this particular event was quite out of place from what he knew as it was coming from the complete opposite direction from the ocean where most forms of fog are formed, also he was pretty sure a mass of water vapor was not supposed to be coloured pink!

Blinking a few times to make sure he was seeing things right and not going crazy the middle aged Dwarf decided to not get involved with whatever was behind this strange occurrence,-probably some wizards fault,-and turned around facing back towards where he left his cart.

However he was more than surprised to see instead of his horse and cart full of goods down a bit further away on the road and instead another wall of pink mist.

This was definitely no ordinary fog.

Vaughn backed away nervously as the pink fog was drawing closer towards him, his beady blue eyes darted back and forth to his left and right in hope of seeing a way of escape, but was met with disappointed as the unnatural mist was surrounding him from all sides.

"I really hate my bad luck as of late."

As if those were the words someone was waiting to hear the pink mist rushed in from all directions, as if it was alive and gobbled the merchant up like he was a piece of candy in a greedy child's hands.

The fog was thick and hard to see through like trying to swim through murky water. Infact Vaughn could not even see his own two hands anymore, even when he waved them in front of his face!

The Dwarf tried and failed to clear some of the fog away so he could see something but it was in vain, so he came to the conclusion that if all else fails then he will just have to walk his way out of this pink pea soup.

Vaughn knew something was wrong as soon as he took his first step with his right leg, his foot made no contact with the ground as it sunk through the mist and the feeling of vertigo had taken over as he could feel nothing solid under him any more.

It only took a few seconds for his brain to realise that he was falling from a great height, he let out a loud scream as his body fell out from under a similar cloud of pink hanging up in the air. Vaughn did not have much time to react or take in the different scenery around him as he could only keep his focus on the stone pathway in front of him that he knew was going to be coloured red with his blood in a few moments.

He closed his eyes and awaited for the inevitable death that awaited him to just be over already, so it came as sort of a surprise when he landed on to something much softer than stone but still hard enough to leave a few bruises, a loud yelp was given out and what was followed by a loud series of curses from both the Dwarf and the person he had landed on.

"What the bloody-!?"

* * *

><p>Ululaik ran lightly along the street, pausing at intervals to kneel to the ground and ensure that he was on the trail. While he was fairly glad that the young woman had managed to escape the guards yet again, the commotion that had been the result of said escape had reached all over town in record time.<p>

He scratched his head, his actions garnering him a few odd looks which he ignored. It wasn't all that hard to track them, they weren't exactly trying to hide their footsteps and they had traces of water and ash on their shoes, most likely from that combination of a burning wagon and a bridge of ice.

He sighed. _Why couldn't she just have followed along that route? Surely the map that I had-the map._ He rummaged through his pockets until his hands closed around a sheaf of paper, and he groaned. _Unulukuna dammit, you have got to be kidding me._

He kept on running, shrugging to himself. _Well, it's not as if I can do anything about it now. Now hopefully I can help those two get out before fifty angry soldiers crash down on them._

* * *

><p>To Narsil's great surprise, Patientia was proving to be uncommonly good company.<p>

She was attentive and wasn't shy about volunteering information about the place she came from:

A world apparently ruled by dragons called Sornieth where the laws of nature were quite different.

When he finished explaining the present circumstances with Galbatorix and the dragons being functionally extinct, he didn't need to be an especially strong telepath to pick up on her unease.

"I think it might be best if I got back home as soon as I can." Patientia said, her frills pressed flat to her skull.

Narsil was about to reply when something fell out of the sky and landed on him.

Patientia narrowly managed to avoid being crushed by diving off of Narsil's shoulder and turning back to see Narsil and the newcomer struggling to untangle themselves.

"What the bloody-!?" Growled the stranger.

Narsil's response was to push the stranger off and roll to his feet.

He was mildly surprised to find himself looking at a slightly fat, gold-brown haired dwarf getting to his feet and swearing a blue streak as he did so.

"Where did you come from, master dwarf?" Narsil asked, covering his surprise with the obvious question.

"The sky." The dwarf replied back in a sarcastic tone of voice as he stood up straight and dusted himself off, Narsil could not tell if he was being rude or was just generally surprised as he was.

"That much I gathered." Narsil replied patiently. "However, I happen to know that dwarves live in the Beor mountains and they're nearly three hundred leagues south of here." He explained. "Besides, your accent is different to the other dwarves I've met."

The dwarf raised one of his bushy eyebrows as he listened to what the stranger had just said "I am afraid I've never heard of any place called the Beor mountains before even in my travels across the lands." he stroked his long braided beard as he was deep in thought. "However I can honestly say I have always been far from my home lands given the traveling I have to do for my business so my accent does usually throw some people off when it comes to meeting someone like me from the Ramtops."

"The Ramtops?" Narsil asked with a thoughtful frown. He'd never heard of that name before.

It was only now the Dwarf started looking around and taking in the strange surroundings around him for the first time. This gave Narsil enough time to take in some more of the Dwarf's features into account:

He was clothed in a blue and gold leather tunic with fine detailed stitching and patterns worked into the fabric. His long beard reached to his round belly speaking in volumes at how old he was and looked well groomed and taken care of with more thought put into it then the shorter hair on top of the Dwarfs head, further down he wore brown trousers and boots that were plain in comparison as was the small backpack he carried on his side.

Apart from that there was not much else to really say about the Dwarf as he clearly looked like a merchant, however something did catch Narsil's eye as he spotted a small one handed axe strapped to the merchants belt, he doubted it was made to be a weapon as it looked more like it was made to be for show as it was highly decorative in carvings then being anything of practical use.

Narsil was brought out of his musings as the Dwarf looked back at him with clear confusion on his face.

"Where am I exactly?"

"Alagaesia, sir." Narsil replied. "And who might you be?" He asked. "I have a feeling you'll be here for a while and we'll likely be travelling together for quite a lot of it."

"Vaughn Moltenslate" the Dwarf replied as he introduced himself with some pride in his voice, however there was still some confusion showing on him face. "Although the name Alagaesia seems to be lost on me." He inquired as the name rolled a crossed his tongue as he tried to get a feeling on the foreign word.

"I am Narsil and that is Patientia." Narsil replied, motioning to where the Fae dragon was still hovering and peering curiously at the dwarf. "As to Alagaesia, well we'd best get going and I'll tell you as we walk." He added ruefully. The first thing he was going to do when he got to Bullridge was go down to the river and drink. He wasn't used to talking this much.

However Vaughn was not paying him much attention as he was staring towards the creature next to Narsil, it was only just now when he had noticed the dragon and was both surprised and curious to what Patientia was.

"What is that thing a pet of yours?" He asked while still keeping eye contact with the dragon, it was a simple question meant to sound calmly but it came out sounding a bit rude due to the Dwarfs gruff tone of voice.

"Excuse me?" Patientia asked, her frills flaring taut and quivering indignantly. "I am not his pet."

Narsil sighed internally as Vaughn and Patientia fell to arguing as they started walking. _It's going to be one of those days. _He thought resignedly as he began to give Vaughn the background on Alagaesia he'd just finished giving Patientia. He had a nasty suspicion this wouldn't be the last time he'd be talking at length today either.

* * *

><p><em><strong><span>Rustic94<span>: To those who are Discworld fans I apologise for any inaccuracies with Discworld magic as I cannot find any good sources that show it in work and I only have a few books of the series (hardly any of them involving a wizard or witch to be honest). So the magic Alice uses is more or less based using the environment like the water in the air to create an ice slide of sorts through there's the exceptions of the gravity spell (which has limitations if used outside to avoid story breaking power) or the illusion spells. If there's something I got wrong or missed, then please, leave it in the reviews but be civil about it.**_

**Master of the Blood Wolves: Wow, that chapter got a lot longer than I think any of us expected.**

**Hopefully next chapter things will start happening, but no promises. That was our goal for this chapter. So, no telling how it will actually turn out.**

**Special thanks to Hideout Writer and LM1991 for reviewing.**

**If you have anything whatsoever to say about this fic, please do not hesitate to drop us a review.**

**See you all next time!**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter IV

To Market, to Market, to Get Out of Town

**Disclaimer: See Chapter One.**

**Also, fair warning: This is a long one.**

Cassenda peered around the corner, the street ahead was filled with people going about their day at the market place, "Well there's a few guards, they'll recognise me but not you Alice." Alice leaned against the wall next to Cassenda, she looked over at a opened crate, thieves most likely, based on the condition of the shattered top panel.

"Well we're taking no chances," Alice rummaged through the said crate, full of filthy rags and clothes within, "Catch."

Cassenda turned around and flinched as she caught the poorly made cowl. She cringed at the insects that she could see on it, "Well… beats going back to prison."

"You've been to prison?" Alice quired as she wrapped the cloak-like rug around herself and took off her pointed hat.

"Yes… and I don't intend to go back to sharing a prison cell nor staying up late to avoid being caught off guard." Cassenda answered as flicked the hood of the cowl over her head. Cassenda walked towards the marketplace, Alice strode alongside her.

The two glanced underneath their hoods at the people around, watching the guards that were on the lookout for Cassenda. Alice tugged lightly on Cassenda's cowl and nodded her head towards a cart where two cloaked individuals were in a argument with the cart owner.

"Looks like that cart could take us to somewhere safe," Alice strode towards the cart, Cassenda pacing after her, "If we move quick enough we can get on and get aw-"

Cassenda grabbed Alice's hand and pulled her back. Alice faced her and was about to scold her before she noticed that Cassenda's gaze was focused towards the cart. The witch turned and saw a group of people moving around the market before heading towards the cart, to her surprise it was the same group of guards that were supposedly left to float in the house.

"Looks like they took another route and beat us here," Cassenda remarked as she made her and Alice back away slowly, "We better go another way before..." Cassenda turned to see guards far behind them that were stopping people with hooded cloaks.

"I think we're in a worse..." Alice paused as she squinted her eyes as she noticed one person in the group of guards, a tall, lanky man who had a plain iron breastplate and copper helmet. "How in the bleedin' heck did he get here..." Alice tensed up as she noticed his little draconian companion, the creature smelling each hooded stranger that the group of guards were searching as they made their trek towards the cart.

"I assume that Mr Twig there is a friend of yours," Cassenda said as she made Alice forward towards the cart, the two moved as fast as they could without drawing attention. "Is he going to be a very big problem?"

"His pet is definitely going to be one, I think it can smell magic and can breath fire." Cassenda paused as she looked at the little creature and her eyes widen in shock.

"Wait, is that… is that a dragon..." Cassenda tried taking her gaze off the creature that came to the guards knees in height. Cassenda then turned her gaze to the cloaked figure and she paused, the cloaks were rather dark, almost pitch black.

"Well it is I guess but not one that I ever…" Alice noticed Cassenda reluctance to move towards the cart, she looked at the cloaked figures who continued to talk with the cart owner.

The man's hands shook as he continued to talk to them, shaking his head and appearing very hesitant to allow the cloaked figures who towered over him on the cart. One of the figures grabbed his arm, the long sleeve hiding the figure's hand. The cart owner trembled more so as he struggled to keep a calm face.

"I've a feeling you know _who_ or maybe _what_ those two are." Alice said as she looked to the three things that surrounded them: the guards coming from behind, the guards coming towards the cart and the hooded figures at the cart.

"Depends on if they've decided to use carts now to get around without being noticed." Cassenda and Alice stood as they consider their options: get caught by the guards who were moving closer or deal with the two hooded figures at the cart who the owner of which was becoming more visibly scared of them.

"Okay, I think I can make a distraction that should give us an opening to get to that cart and get out of here." Alice said, looking at the copper helmed watchman and just discerning something scaly clinging to his back.

"Alright, what do you need me to do?" Cassenda asked, wondering briefly if she could kill the two cloaked beings without getting in over her head. She wasn't confident.

"I'll be functionally unconscious while I do it, so you'll have to carry me to the cart." Alice replied, propping herself against the wall and making herself comfortable.

"Wait, what are you doing?" Cassenda asked, an edge in her voice.

"It's called Borrowing." Alice replied with her eyes closed. "Look, you'll see what it does in a minute, just make sure you tell people I'm not dead while I'm out, okay?"

Cassenda nodded. "Okay." She said grimly when she saw Alice still had her eyes closed.

* * *

><p>"Sir, we are not asking for much," Thumper said coldly as he tighten his grip on the trembling man's arm. "We want a way out of this place without attention, we are willing to pay you in gold. Now, let us on before I- "<p>

"Thumper if you hold his arm any tighter you'll break it," Granite tugged on his golem friend's cloak. Thumper loosened his grip slightly but held the man's arm, "Now sir, please allow me and my friend here on this cart. I will pay ya back, we'll have beers and my friend will not try to rip ya head off and stuff flour down ya throat."

The man stayed silent as gazed in fear at the two cloaked creatures, his mouth struggling to form words as sweat covered his skin. Thumper cringed, "Hurry up and make your choice man, your skin secreting fluid is just… just disgusting."

"I can scream for the guar-" The man yelped as Thumper started to twist his grip on the man's arm, the golem's eyes galred down at the man despite not having the facially features to show it.

"Do so and I'll crush your skull like a cake." Thumper then grabbed the man by his arms and lifted him until him and the man were at eye level, the man's legs dangled as he held his breath in fear. "You can either say yes to the gold, drop us off somewhere out of sight and pretend we never happened or… you can scream for which I will use you as a club against the guards who swarm us and trust me, the last person who I use as a club looks a lot more worse than my friend here."

"Oi! Ya no master pretty yourself Thump, ya could make a statue cry if you gav' them wink!" Granite snickered, Thumper growled as his eyes looked at the troll who had a large smirk on his face.

* * *

><p>"Alright, everybody listen up: Allen, you take your men and sweep the southern edge of the market. Chenny, do the same for the east. Sheldrick, go around and set up guards at the entrances. No one gets in or out without us noticing. I'm taking my group and am going west. Richard, you tag along with anyone you want, everyone good?"<p>

"Alright, sure."

"Got it boss-man."

"Yup. Heh, you oughta been an officer. Real, permanent one."

"Thanks Chenny, but I like not having to worry about gettin nailed to my bed by a knife in the night."

"Guild assassins?" Richard looked to Lukas, his arms crossed as his curiosity peaked. Alfie darted near anyone that the guards were approached by or had approached.

Lukas stared at him blankly. "Guild Assassins? You telling me your assassins have a guild where you're from?"

"They do but they have a lot of rules when they're contracted in inhumate someone, most notably to wear black clothes, that and not many of the nobility students that go there become assassins. That lot get quite a good education from one lass I courted who attend the Guild." Richard answered back in a matter-of-fact tone.

Lukas and the rest continued to stare at him before Allen spoke up. "Your place is bloody weird."

"Yours probably has things that would baffle you but you just haven't found them yet, as I am sure my home has stuff that even the wizards don't know about." Richard replied as he looked around, his gaze falling on the two hooded figures near the cart. "What non-human beings do ye have to deal with?"

"Well, there's the Urgals, big nasty bastards with horns. Raiders and killers from what I know, nasty work. Then I think that some guys down south are dealing with dwarves although I'm not too sure on what capacity, and I am fairly certain that there's elves up to the north. And then there are what we like to call: Those creepy black hooded fuckers that have no concept of personal space. Have no idea what they are but they aren't human. People don't move like that." Lukas followed Richard's gaze. "Ya think those are the two we're going for? The stone dudes?"

"Possibly but the cloaks are black," Richard raised a wearily eyebrow as his eyes looked in Lukas's direction, "We'll have to approach calmly and non-aggressively as the possibility of facing a golem is not pleasant prospect nor are those black hooded mystery creatures that you mentioned a few seconds ago."

"Eh, the stone dudes then. It ain't the black creeps, people aren't actively avoiding them. Well, everyone to your positions we can talk later. You lot come with me and look non-threatening."

One of the men opened his mouth.

"You look non-threatening by not having your weapon in a ready position, son. Any more questions? No? Then let's go."

"Let me do the talking Lukas," Richard said as he walked beside the captain, "They would more likely react… less hostile to a copper than your average guard here.

Lukas shrugged. "Sure, lead the way Richard."

Richard strode towards the larger of the two cloaked figure who held the cart owner up, he then rapped his knuckles against where the back shoulder blade of the being would be, "Excuse me sir but could you put down that man and have a nice, peaceful talk with me and these lads behind me here."

The hooded figure turned slowly and stared wide eyed down at Richard whose expression of a pleasant smile change to that of sheer surprise and bafflement, "Richard? What in the Disc are you doing here?!"

"Thumper?" Richard looked over to the other figure who grinned nervously underneath the hood of the cloak, "Granite… what the bleedin' heck are you doing here?"

"Hey, I asked first Richy."

Lukas looked at them. "You lot know each other?"

Richard faced Lukas and crossed his arms, "These two are or rather were living as tenants at my parents' bakery and home, so..." Richard turned again to Thumper who rubbed his rocky, cracked forehead in confusion, "How did _ye _get here and please tell me that you have a way back?"

Thumper shrugged his massive shoulders, "No idea, one second I'm climbing down into the sewer with Granite and the next second we landed on kegs of wine and beer. You?"

"Chased after Alfie into a puddle."

Lukas snorted. "What, you jump in or something? I mean, puddles big enough for a man aren't exactly unnoticeable or anything. And unless things work differently over there they tend to be on the ground."

"It was rather big, but puddles from where I come from don't often do magical stuff… unless there is a wizard or witch involved, and either one can make your day a rather unfortunate one by mere accident." Richard replied with a shrug, Alfie still looking around them for magic users as she smelled everyone came into contact with.

Lukas winced. "Ach, tell me about it. Got into a skirmish with some rebels and the bastards had a mage. Not nice watching a mans legs just break on their own, and not fun fighting when you know your heart might literally stop at any moment."

Richard nodded as Alfie suddenly stopped and moved towards Lukas, moving behind him and sat down quietly before staring off into the distance. Thumper rubbed his arm before he spoke to Lukas, "So are we in trouble, sir...?" Granite looked at Alfie with concern but gazed right back at Richard and Lukas.

The man looked back at the duo. "Well, other than this did you guys attack or assault anyone without provocation? Steal anything? Destroy anything on purpose?"

Granite shook his head and tugged on the cloak, "We only stole these since the first time we met someone here they certainly didn't react pleasantly to us and the kegs were an accident I-" Granite screamed in surprise as Alfie bleached out a burst of flames at Lukas backside before rushing into the crowd and bleached more fire. Every civilian scattering for cover or running towards the exits of the marketplace.

"Alfie stop! Heel!" Richard shouted as he chased after her, his face full with dread and shock at the draconic creature sudden and unprovoked outburst. Thumper followed in pursuit of the two.

Lukas, meanwhile, was roaring out every foul word that man had recorded, some that had not been recorded, and some they were fairly certain he had just made up on the spot at the top of his lungs, meaning that every child in that quarter of the market was getting an on-the-spot vocabulary lesson. The soldiers around him were hesitating, unsure of what to do before more swearing broke them out of it, sending some of them running at the dragon while others tried to keep the peace.

"Richard, why isn't she stopping?! She always stop when you tell her to!" Thumper shouted as he tried to grab Alfie but flinched and ducked away as it leapt at his face. The draconic creature hissed as it sprint around the market, setting stalls on fire. The remaining civilians running towards the nearby well to gather water to fight the fires.

"I don't know!" Richard held his hands against the side of his head in sheer shock and confusion, "She'd stop without… oh no!" Alfie leapt into the window of a nearby tavern, the people inside fled the building as burst of flames came out of the windows one by one before Alfie leapt from the second story balcony and onto the roof of another building. The tavern owner came out of its doors screaming as he ripped of his apron that had almost caught on fire.

"My business, my home is on fire! Someone get the water before all my blackmarket beer goes up in flames!" The man covered his mouth at the mention of the last part, and moved as stealthily as possible from the commotion as the guards and civilians gather pails of water for the fire in the traven.

Granite just shook his head, his face twisted in a horrified and saddened expression at such a lose of his place that practice his preaching ideals.

During all the commotion a brown cloaked figure held up another smaller figure that dangled off the other's arm and approached the cart. The awake one hurled the other onto the back of the cart and with a quick movement of its hand snatched the purse of a fleeing noble woman that happened by the cart.

The brown cloaked figure approached the cart owner and put the purse into his hand, the man nodded and got on top of the cart and prepared to drive the cart.

Lukas had gotten back to his feet and was running towards the chaos, taking it all in as he ran in. He groaned as he saw the chaos, and started when there was a crash from up ahead.

* * *

><p>Ululaik grunted with exertion as he stood up, ignoring the aching in his knees as he looked at the thieves. Originally he had been searching for two others, but such a blatant violation of anothers property for such base reasons needed to be addressed.<p>

The large cloaked figure looked up and saw a large man jump down towards the slow moving cart. He landed to its surprise quite gracefully and unharmed by how he stood up over it.

The other cloaked figure laid down on the floor of the cart, non-reacting to the world around it.

"You again?" the cloaked figure spoke, the female voice made the man frown his eyebrows as he recognised it.

"You are….that woman? That was hiding in the barrel?"

The cloaked figure looked around to see if anyone noticed, "... you could have been a little more subtle about your entrance," Cassenda nudged Alice who laid on the floor of the cart motionless.

"This 'Borrowing' thing she can do must be really hard, she insisted that I tell folks that she's not dead. Apparently it means she can… put her mind in animal's body and use it, hence why that little thing is on the rampage." Cassenda said as she looked to the chaos behind them, the man with the satchel and strange metal helm held onto the little draconic creature that he finally managed to grab.

The creature continued to bleach fire and try to claw its way out of his grip, the man carefully and successfully managed to avoid any harm that the creature tried to inflict upon him as he tried to calm it down.

Ululaik shrugged. "It was the fastest method to get down. Oh, and I have come to give you this, something I forgot to do so in our last meeting." He reached into his pocket and took out a heavily folded sheet of paper, handing it over to her.

Cassenda took the piece of paper and looked at it as she kept poking Alice who remained motionless, "What's this exactly?"

"A map." And it was clear that it was, indeed, a map; one with a multitude of markings detailing various routes for escape and entry into various sections of the town, with the marketplace completely blotted out in red.

"Huh… thanks." Cassenda smiled from underneath the hood.

She yelped as Alice shot up and twitched uncontrollably. Cassenda gripped her shoulders and tried to stop her from twitching, "Whoa, calm down Alily!"

Ululaik looked at the two with interest. "I see you have found yourself a companion."

"One that uses magic too no less." Cassenda replied, Alice looked around dizzied and held her head in her hands.

"Ahhh…" The elf witch hissed in pain as she gripped her head in her hands, "I used too much magic today… not good for the mind." Alice lifted a part of her hood to reveal her ear. "Is there anything leaking out of my ear, blood or mashed brains bits?"

The man observed her ears. "None that I can see. Interesting. Are pointed ears normal for people outside the desert?"

"For elves, yes. For humans well... no." Cassenda answered as she looked to the lanky man that was holding the draconic creature in the marketplace.

The man patted its head as it seemed to calm down finally, the guards around him were busy fighting the fires and putting them out along with the civilians. The little creature in the man's hands slowly looked towards the three in the cart. Frills around its neck popped up and its mouth opened in what appeared to be a hiss.

Cassenda nudged the cart owner with her elbow, the man took the cue and made the horses move quicker.

One of the guards near the dragon creature noticed Ululaik, still standing up, and waved. "Oh hey there! Fancy meeting you here!" He began approaching.

Ululaik responded in kind. "Hello sir!". He seemed to be at total ease with the fact that he was standing up in an accelerating cart.

Cassenda and Alice laid down on the floor of the cart before the man noticed them, both assuming positions that made them look like sleeping passengers.

The guardsman motioned to the cart driver to slow down, talking as he approached. "Yeah, hey listen I was wondering if you could help us here. We have a thief and her accomplice on the run here in the market, and while they can't actually get out, it would make it a bit easier if you helped, you know extra hands and all."

"I have no pressing obligations at the moment sir, given your previous advice I accept."

"Alright, thanks, now sorry ladies but just need to check…" He reached over the cart and began moving to pull up Alice's hood, taking care not to knock against Cassenda.

Cassenda's hand reached for the guard's wrist, her hand moving like that of a blind person's as if she was making sure that she grabbed his wrist, "The little gal has bleedin' gush from an accident this mornin' and the first thing you want to do is to rub more salt in an already bad wound by showing it in the light in front of everyone! What type of man are you?!"

Cassenda pretended to cough harshly, she struggled to make her voice sound strained, sickly and sore.

The guard started. "Oh shit, really? Sorry about that." Turning around, he bellowed at the group. "Johnny! Luke! Get your lazy asses over here and bring that aid kit with you!"

Cassenda froze, _Shit, now what do I do?_

Just then, the draconic creature was set down on the ground again. The guards and civilians moved away from it as it headed towards the cart.

The lanky man known as Richard turned his watchful gaze from it and started to converse with the clay giant, Thumper.

Before little draconic creature sprint head on to the cart, two black cloaked figure from the far corner of the market were moving towards it themselves, people moving out of their way as they closed in on it. The creature hissed in their direction as it neared the guard in the cart, not once letting the black cloaked figures out of its sight as it stood a few feet away from the cart.

_What's that thing so pissed about?_ Cassenda thought as she tried to quickly think of something to get out of the impending mess she made worse.

The guard noticed the creature as well and groaned. "Oh dammit, alright you two, you went through the basic training right? This girl has a head wound, do something about it while I go over there so that thing doesn't set everyone on this cart on fire."

Ululaik stared at him. "On fire? Do you mean to tell me that lizard is a -" He was cut off.

"Tell NO ONE about that thing, alright? We're trying to keep it secret and while we're failing miserably, there's no need for undue conversation."

Nodding, Ululaik removed the man's hand from his mouth. "I see."

"Got the kit commander Lukas, is she the patient?"

"Yup, now see ya." With that, Lukas walked off towards a fountain.

The black cloaked figures moved closer to the cart but stopped as Granite neared the cart and gazed in their direction.

"Sir," Granite tugged on the sleeve of the guard with the kit and nodded his head to the black cloaked figures, "Those two there… "

The young man turned to Granite, staring before replying. "Yes?"

"Do strangers often wear dark clothes like those on days like this and scare..." Granite looked at Alfie who hissed even more than ever and was holding its body up like a provoked cat, "... provoke animals like Alfie here?"

The guard followed Granites stare, before his face paled. "Oh…..fuck." He turned to his , compatriot and motioned to him to go regain Lukas before adopting the air of a man before his imminent execution.

"I have a feeling that someone here caught those twos' attention and not in a good way." Granite said, who noticed in the corner of his eye that the two cloaked figures in the cart were trying to slowly move out of the cart unnoticed.

Lukas turned to see the black cloaks approaching and uttered a curse, stomping towards the two. "Alright, hello there. What brings you two here?" It was quite obvious the man was nervous, from the way his hand kept gripping and releasing the handle of his mace.

Thumper and Richard stood next to Lukas. Richard seemed nervous as he gripped the handle of his sword but continued to smoke his pipe while Thumper was more confident than he or Lukas were and stood proudly on the right of Lukas.

"Information has been stolen by the Varden." The smaller of the two cloaked said, her tone of voice barely hiding the lack restraint in controlling her anger, "Your _dear_ superior lost a message that he was supposed to keep secret and now the Varden may have information that could damage the empire's hold!"

Lukas blinked. "Well, shit. Really that bad? I mean, hell, I've done duty against them before but it's not as if they can kill the king or anything. What, they get a scroll that tells 'em how to kill fifty thousand men at once?"

The hooded figure raised her hand and opened her palm, a burst of wind sent Lukas flying back a few feet, Richard was lifted a few feet back as well while Thumper struggled to stay on his feet. "Hold that tongue of yours unless you want it turned into bubbling mass of cooking meat _Lukas_." The other cloaked figure gripped the other's hand and pulled it down.

"My... less than calm associate here has a point. While the information on the scroll stolen can not be revealed, we would prefer it found and returned to your superior and is thus later burnt. You have… a day and a night to do so before my associate decides to cook someone. Now gather your men and stop messing about in the market."

Groaning, Lukas sat upright, got to his feet, and nodded. "Understood, sir. Anything else?"

The deeper sounding cloaked figure paused before she spoke again, "Yes, after you find the scroll, gather the..." she gestured to Thumper and Richard, "...strangers that truly stick out here, we would like to talk to them much, much later."

"Understood, sir."

The smaller cloaked figure pointed her fingers at him and was about to snap her fingers and say something before the second grabbed her hand and shook her head in disappointment, "No, you don't get to cook him for not saying Ma'am. Let's go, and Lukas, good hunting to you." The two cloaked figures as Richard, Granite, Thumper and Alfie gathered towards Lukas. The troll using a part of his cloak to wipe the dirt and blood off Lukas's face.

"Huh, my old superior, Vimes. wouldn't let anyone do that to a honest copper for petty reasons. Be they a fellow copper, crook or a citizen." Richard said with disgust as he watched the two cloaked figure disappear into the alleyway.

Lukas grunted as he sat down again. "Well, shit." He turned to the young man with the satchel of bandages and began speaking. "Alright, you: Go over to the main guardhouse and get everyone you can over here. Leave a skeleton crew to make sure there's at least some guard presence in the city proper, I want the market crawling with guards. We know they're in here and they can't get out given that we're on alert everywhere. Now it's time to flush them out." As the soldier sprinted off to fulfill his orders, Lukas leaned against a wall. "I have never been so fucked in my life before."

"At least that little one wasn't a werewolf or vampire," Thumper said aloud as he patted Lukas's shoulder gently, "Ha, if she was then those last few minutes ago would have been your last painful ones."

* * *

><p>"...So yes, that's about it. Might not want to bring up that 'Tak' of yours if you want to come to the Beors with me, but beyond that, don't go discussing religion and you ought to be fine." Narsil said, dearly wishing he had magic so he could conjure himself a drink. His throat was on <em>fire<em>.

Vaughn just gave a low grunt as a sign of acknowledgement that he would take that advice.

Actually, now that Narsil thought about it, he could smell wood smoke coming from a little way off the road and a voice rather enthusiastically shouting what seemed to be an attempt at a rousing speech punctuated by orders.

Motioning for his strange companions to wait a moment, Narsil crept into the brush in the general direction of the smoke and noise and without too much difficulty and without raising too much noise, found himself on the edge of a large camp.

A cluster of what looked like at least thirty men in mismatched, unkempt armour and armed with an impressive assortment of weapons stood looking inward at another man in slightly better kept looking chainmail, who was pacing gesticulating and doing all the shouting.

As Narsil watched, one of the men tentatively raised his hand as the shouting man paused for breath.

"Um, why are we attacking this village again?" He asked, sounding lost. "I mean, in the past, sure, but now there's a proper guard there and a palisade wall and everything."

The man turned to him and answered in a surprisingly subdued voice. "For you? Because you are getting paid and once inside you'll have free reign to loot everything that isn't nailed down and take a crowbar to anything that is. As for me….you don't really need to know that now do you?"

_Oh dear._ Narsil thought. _Bandits. That's not good. And a Bandit with an agenda. Also not good._

"That's providing we get in. They haven't shipped a whole bunch of green recruits, there's some actual bloody soldiers in there." The speaker argued. "Lootin', pillagin' and rapin' is all well and good, but I'd rather live to enjoy it. Why aren't we going after the farmsteads and hamlets to draw those bloody red-vests away? You know, playin' this smart. We only signed on 'cause you said you was good with this sort o' thing."

The leader stared at him, before smiling. "You know what? I like you. You think, which is more than what can be said for some other meatheads I've worked with."

The bandit who'd spoken seemed to realise exactly what he'd done. Maybe it was the ghosts of every well-meaning individual that had argued against idiocy in these situations throughout the multiverse. Maybe it was his instinct of self-preservation making a belated appearance, but he suddenly seemed a lot more self-conscious and cautious.

"Thank you…" He said, saying each word carefully, as if he expected something bad to happen in the next breath.

Still, smiling, the man answered. "As for your questions: Yes, the farmsteads are far more vulnerable than the walled town. The little problem is, that the moment the first patrol they send out gets killed do you think they'll just feed us men? What'll happen is that we'll get hammered by a hundred, two hundred soldiers who sally forth from the nice, walled town. I want to remove that base from the equation before we spend our time taking a stroll through the countryside. As for the veteran soldiers…." With that the leader reached to his back and withdrew a massive, iron two-hander, giving it several easy swings. "Leave them to me. What most of you ought to focus on is how to, once we're past the walls, you're going to actually make the trip worthwhile. I recommend a sack or two."

At that moment he seemed to remember something. "Oh! That reminds me; you and you and you, come up here." He pointed at the man as well as the men to his immediate left and right, motioning for them to walk up.

The three approached, the man who'd spoken the most hesitantly.

The spirits of previous malcontents in the same position seemed to lean closer, even though the bandit wasn't to know that.

Still smiling, the man stabbed his sword into the ground before ducking behind a counter and popping back up, holding two large crates with one arm and another one in the other. There was an audible thud as he tossed them in front of the chosen men. "Go on, open 'em up."

The men complied hesitantly, managing to do so while keeping the crates at arm's length, fully expecting something fatal to occur.

"Well, 'ent that a sight…" Muttered one quietly, but quite audibly to Narsil's ear. He was beginning to get stiff crouching motionless at the edge of the camp, but he watched as the bandits hefted pieces of plate armour and large metal shields from them.

"I, well...Thanks." The first speaker said, clearly at a loss for words and heedless of the spirits of the watching malcontents howling in outrage.

The man continued to smile, cheerily replying. "Welcome! However, that isn't why I brought you up here. See those thickass steel tower shields over there? I want you three to go and pick 'em up, put 'em on, then come back." He then turned to the other bandits.

"Now, I'm sure you're thinking that I'm just another loudmouth, saying he can do everything then getting his head chopped off by a ten-year red-vest veteran. This is to….reaffirm your faith, if you will." The man was walking around, idly swirling his blade as he did so.

"A'right, now what?" Asked the first bandit, trying to get used to the feel of the heavy armour as he clanked up.

There was no response, just a flash of whirling metal as the leader turned and swung. There was a pause, then the tops of the heavy shields slid off, the leader having sheared through them in one blow while leaving their holders unharmed.

"Well, bugger me." The bandit to the original speaker's left said as the other two stared mutely at their now-shorter shields.

The first speaker looked to the leader.

"Yeah. Just give the word Mister Auditore." He said, nodding jerkily as he clanked back to the rest of the bandits.

Narsil, meanwhile had seen enough and crept quietly back to the road. Behind him he could hear the leader, Auditore, shouting to his men, "There's more suits behind over here! No killing for anyone's armor!"

When he got there, he beckoned his travelling companions to follow him as he strode quickly down the road, trying not to outdistance them.

"That was a bandit camp. They're going to attack Bullridge. We have to warn them." Narsil said as Patientia flitted down to his shoulder.

"But what about us?" Patientia asked, nodding to Vaughn. "You just said that the king would lock us up if he found us."

"This far out I think we can risk it and if anyone wants to try and be a hero when the bandits are dead…" Narsil slowed to a stop and twisted a section of his staff, causing a three foot blade to slide out of the end. "Then I'll silence them and stay away from this area for a decade or two."

"Sounds like the best plan to me." Vaughn said as he kept up an even pace behind his two new companions.

An arrow hit the ground behind them, a note tied to it with a string.

The group stopped at the thud and eyed the arrow suspiciously, before Vaughn gingerly picked it up and opened the note as though he expected the arrow to explode.

He looked at it blankly, cursed quietly, then wordlessly passed it to Narsil, who briefly scanned the note:

_Helloooo elfy! Been a long time since I played with one of your kind!_

_See you at Bullridge!_

_-Ryanold Auditore_

_P.S. It's not nice to eavesdrop. Now run along, you're still in range._

**There seems to be a pattern here: **

**We start a chapter with the intention of getting this lot together and then it doesn't happen.**

**We're getting there, but probably not for a chapter or two.**

**Now, over to my co-authors for a word:**

**LoG: It appears Lukas was justified in his avoidance of positions of authority. See you all in the next chapter.**

**Rustic94: Boy was figuring out how Cassenda and Alice get out of trouble is tough to do. Cass's luck seems to help and hinder her at the drop of a dime. Also, hope the borrowing magic is close enough to Discworld novels for ye. Whoever thought writing with three people could produce unexpected results. See ye next chapter.**

**Artark: Vaughn did not appear to have much to do in this chapter but not everyone can share the same stage at once, he will get his moments to shine at some point as well as some of his past revealed in later chapters. See you all next chapter.**

**Also a big thank you from all of us to LM1991 for reviewing and for everyone who favourited and is following.**

**Chapter 5 is in the works and is already about eight pages long...**

**Big personal thanks from me to artark, LoverOfGames and Rustic94 without whom this story wouldn't exist and we'll see you next time.**

**'Til then.**


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